That’s the problem with drinking, I thought, as I poured myself a drink. If something bad happens you drink in an attempt to forget; if something good happens you drink in order to celebrate; and if nothing happens you drink to make something happen.
Me in class.
- Me: okay, gotta focus. Big test coming up.
- Me: ooooh, when did that poster get there?
- Me: ugh, split ends.
- Me: why is the back of your head so attractive?!
- Me: HOW DID YOU GET THAT ANSWER?
- Me: just act like you understand.
- Me: don't pick me, don't pick me...
- Me: so here's my number, so call me maybe.
- Me: DANG THAT SONG IT'S SO CATCHY.
- Me: it's only been fifteen minutes?
- Me: I hate you all.
- Me: someone shoot me.
